


Aches and Pains

by The_Lady_smaell



Category: Naruto
Genre: Challenge: kakairu_fest Mini-Bingo, Community: kakairu_fest, Developing Relationship, Domestic Goddess Kakashi, Fuuinjutsu Master Umino Iruka, Gen, Hatake Kakashi is so Done, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Humor, I Will Go Down With This Ship, Illnesses, Iruka is a Little Shit, Iruka is an idiot, Kakashi is a justified asshole, M/M, Not sure what else to put yet, The Author Regrets Nothing, This will probably end up cracky, Why is picking on characters so much fun., Workaholic!Iruka, unbeta'd we die like men
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-11
Updated: 2020-02-13
Packaged: 2021-02-25 05:27:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21750772
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Lady_smaell/pseuds/The_Lady_smaell
Summary: Iruka has been working hard, too hard and it's about to hit the fan. Luckily he has a good 'friend' to help him through the fallout,ifhe doesn't murder him first.(Written as my FREE space for the KakaIru Mini Bingo 2019)
Relationships: Dai-nana-han | Team 7 & Hatake Kakashi, Haruno Sakura & Umino Iruka, Hatake Kakashi/Umino Iruka, Umino Iruka & Uzumaki Naruto, Umino Iruka/Hatake Kakashi (developing)
Comments: 53
Kudos: 161
Collections: KakaIru 2019 Mini Bingo!





	1. Catching up.

**Author's Note:**

> So here is my first entry for the Kakairu Mini Bingo. I decided to start with my free square because A) I had already had this started before I entered and B) I signed up to the KakaIru.rocks Discourse forum and the gang there said they enjoyed looking after each other fics so I couldn't resist *Grins*
> 
> Chapter are only going to be short so Hopefully I'll be able to churn them out quickish \\_O_/

Aches and Pains.

"Iruka-Sensei you made it!"

Iruka smiled at Naruto from his position at the entrance to Ichiraku, head dipped under the curtain. He gave a polite nod to Sakura, who gave him a warm smile back and slid into the seat next to the rambunctious blonde hiding a slight wince of pain.

"Of course I made it Naruto-Kun, it's been a while and we haven't had a proper chance to catch up since you got back."

Iruka didn't mention that it was more due to his own busy schedule rather than Naruto's. Things had been so crazy recently he'd pretty much been working non-stop, the village was still rebuilding and everyone had to pull their weight; even Chūnin such as himself. Naruto apparently understood and nodded.

"It's fine Iruka-Sensei. I know you've been busy, I'm surprised Baa-chan hasn't been getting you more help, Izumo and Kotetsu told me you've been pretty much running the academy and the missions room."

The brunette felt the flush rise up his neck, he hadn't been doing  _ that _ much, not really. Well, they were really short staffed at the academy and missions desk there was no denying that and he had been taking short missions as well but that was besides the point. 

In comparison to the field ninja it was barely  _ anything _ .

And speaking of field ninja, at that precise moment Hatake Kakashi walked into the small restaurant, he gave a quick wave to his subordinates and Iruka before taking a seat next to him. Iruka but his lip in nervousness, while he was certainly on speaking terms with the copy-nin he just couldn't feel entirely comfortable around the other man. He couldn't quite put his finger on  _ why _ though. 

"Good evening Iruka-san" Kakashi said pleasantly "How have the little hellions been treating you?"

Iruka snorted, appreciating the switch to a comfortable topic.

"They're not hellions Hatake-san…" A silver brow arched "Okay, maybe they are… Yuma decided today that he didn't need any more practice with the practice weapons and used one he had stolen from his father."

Iruka unconsciously readjusted his shoulder and the Jounin followed the movement, a frown visible beneath his mask.

"It's my own fault, I didn't notice until it was too late..." The brunette admitted, an embarassed blush colouring his cheeks.

"That's not like you." Kakashi said bluntly.

Iruka couldn't deny it, he'd been a bit out of sorts all day.

"Well at least no one was hurt…" Again the Jounin raised his eyebrow. "Well seriously hurt, took a kunai to the shoulder but it was minimal; my vest took the brunt of it."

Kakashi's eye swept across his back and the brunette felt shame curl in his gut. He really should have been paying closer attention, true he'd been covering two classes at the time but that was besides the point. He should have been  _ better _ .

Iruka winced as he felt an unfamiliar pain start to radiate from his back but then stamped it down before he could look even more pathetic in front of Kakashi and his former students.

"You need to be more careful Sensei."

There was no criticism in the Jounin's voice, just a hint of concern.

"I'll try Kakashi-san."

Apparently appeased by Iruka's answer the copy-nin quickly ordered his meal as did the brunette. Teuchi smiled and immediately set to work and within 10 minutes all four patrons had their meals in front of them. 

"Itadakimadu!" Naruto crowed before happily chowing down, followed by Sakura. 

The Chūnin kept his face facing forwards in attempt to provide Kakashi with a modicum of privacy with which to eat his meal. Slowly he began to eat the ramen, savouring the exquisite taste, Ichiraku was  _ truly _ the best ramen in fire country. Iruka made it through about half of his meal before the pain flaring from his back erupted again and began to wind its way around his torso. He took a deep breath willing it away but it appeared to be much more stubborn than just a regular pain. Gritting his teeth the brunette soldiered through the rest of the meal, he didn't want to ruin the first evening he'd managed to spend with Naruto in  _ months _ .

"Are you okay Iruka-Sensei?" Naruto's concerned voice cut through his thoughts.

"I'm fine…" He replied, albeit weakly.

Naruto didn't buy it, Iruka knew that; he was pretty sure Kakashi and Sakura didn't either. 

He couldn't think, the pain was getting worse it was wrapping itself around his entire chest in a crushing embrace. It felt like he was trapped in a vice and every breath was starting to be a struggle. The pressure was starting to make him feel nauseous and he could feel the colour start to drain from his face and his heart was pounding in his chest.

Of fuck, was he having a heart attack?

"Iruka…" Kakashi's voice swam in and out of focus.

The brunette jumped to his feet and hissed in pain, fuck it hurt to even move. He staggered out of Ichiraku's and into a side alley leaning against the wall as he threw up his meal completely unaware that he'd been followed by his companions. He'd been trained to deal with pain, he was a fucking Shinobi but this was like every fibre of his being was on fire. 

"Iruka-Sensei…" A warm hand landed on his shoulder and he winced again.

Naruto, oh Kami he didn't want him to see him like this.

"Sakura, run ahead get them ready for us." 

_ Kakashi _ , his mind helpfully supplied through the haze, that was Kakashi.

Iruka opened his mouth to tell the man to leave him alone, but more of his meal decided to come up and he could feel the edges of his vision blur. 

"It's okay Sensei, take a deep breath."

The brunette tried to suck in a breath and  _ holy fuck _ it hurt. He could breathe so that was at least something but he could barely draw in any air, anything beyond a short puff was agony. 

The darkness was sliding closer now and the last thing Iruka remembered seeing before he passed out was a concerned grey eye looking down at him and a distant voice calling his name.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. Coming Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Iruka enjoys the benefits of very good drugs and bemoans his lot in life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See end.

Chapter 2: Coming Down.

The first thing that Iruka noticed when he started to come around was that he was on the really, _ really _ good stuff. He could still feel the pain at the edges of his consciousness but he was surrounded by that lovely floaty, disjointed feeling that could only mean the presence of  _ top quality _ painkillers.

The Chunin wasn’t exactly sure if this was a very good or a very bad thing.

He attempted to crack open an eye and  _ Owwww _ , whoever had put the sun right next to his bed needed to go die in an equivalently bright and blazing fire. He tried again, this time having a little more success; it only felt like a torch being shone directly in his eyes rather than a sun now. A few more cursory blinks and the room around him began to fade into view.

Hospital,  _ of course _ it was the hospital. 

The memories started to trickle back and Iruka felt embarrassment and shame curl in his stomach, he had made himself look like a  _ complete loser _ in front of Naruto, Kakashi and Sakura.

_ 'Well no difference there then.'  _ He thought bitterly.

He attempted to shift his body into a more comfortable position but his entire torso protested the second he started moving. The Chūnin hissed as the vice like feeling returned leaving him feeling nauseated again. Even with the, what he assumed, ridiculous amount of pain medication in his system it was unpleasant as fuck. The turn of the door handle startled Iruka from his thoughts and he hurriedly closed his eyes pretending to be unconscious.

The door swung inwards and Iruka heard the 'click clack' of heels on the stone floor followed by a softer footfall he didn't recognize.

Great, Hokage-sama. This was going to be  _ fun. _

"You can stop pretending Iruka, I know you're awake." Her voice was tense.

The brunette sheepishly opened his eyes and willed down the blush that was forming on his cheeks. Tsunade stood with her arms crossed over her chest a look of annoyance on her deceptively youthful features.

"How do you feel?" She asked, her voice softening slightly.

The Chūnin bit his lip, embarrassed.

"Sore." He managed to croak out.

The Hokage let out a soft snort and rolled her eyes at the obvious statement.

"I'm not surprised considering the state you were dragged here in. Honestly I think you might be even worse than this idiot."

Here Tsunade jabbed her thumb over her shoulder, gesturing to the other person who had entered the room.

"Yo."

And yup Iruka's night had officially hit rock bottom, this was the absolute  _ last _ thing he needed. He narrowed his eyes at the Hokage as if to ask _ 'what the actual fuck is he still doing here' _ , Tsunade being Tsunade carefully ignored the question and focused on checking him over leaving Kakashi to just sit at the end of the bed reading that damnable book of his.

If Iruka could have moved he would have flipped himself over and screamed into his pillow.

Instead he had to content himself with glaring disapprovingly at the Jounin.

Tsunade finished her examination and stepped back her face serious and levelled the brunette with an intense, disapproving stare making Iruka feel very much like the naughty school boy he'd once been.

"Seriously what is it with you idiots trying to work yourself to death?! I'm serious Sensei…"

Iruka gulped "Um…."

The Hokage threw her hands up in exasperation.

"Do you even know what you did?" She snapped "You pushed yourself so much that you inflamed the muscles and cartilage in your chest wall I thought it was  _ actually _ going to crush your organs!"

The Chūnin doesn't know how exactly to respond to that so he remains silent. Tsunade continues her rant, starting to pace about the room.

"I've had to seal your kami-damned chakra because it was causing to get even worse, how the  _ actual _ fuck Iruka-kun?! Only you would manage to find the one injury that I apparently can't remotely heal with ninjutsu."

"I… I'm sorry?" Iruka answered lamely, not entirely sure it's an apology she wants to hear.

Amber eyes flash dangerously "Damn straight you better be sorry, you put yourself out of commission because you were either too stubborn or too stupid to give yourself a break."

The brunette swallows a gulp of air past the lump of shame that is stuck in his throat, he feels the tightening in his chest again and the wave of nausea hits so fast it's dizzying. He doesn't even think, he just reacts and twists to the side retching, the pain seizing control.

He feels a warm hand gently rubbing his back and after a few minutes the wave of nausea and pain subsides. Iruka is surprised to see a gloved hand holding a glass of water being held in front of his face and he graciously takes a sip despite his embarrassment. Gingerly he moves his aching body back into its previous position, the hand that had been rubbing his back gently coaxing him back onto the pillows. 

Hatake Kakashi's masked face comes into view and Iruka feels his face ignite.

"Better Sensei?" 

Iruka nods not trusting his voice, the look of concern in the lone, grey eye stirring something in him he can't quite put a name to. 

Tsunade steps forward and flicks his ear gently.

"Emotional stress also appears to be a trigger." She said simply.

_ 'Well isn't that just peachy.'  _ Iruka thought sourly and it clearly showed on his face because the Jounin perched on the edge of his bed let out a soft chuckle. Weary brown eyes narrowed into a glare and despite the obvious discomfort it brought he gave the copy-nin a little shove with his leg. It was just enough to knock him to the floor, whether Kakashi was just humoring him or not Iruka didn't know.

The Hokage let out a short bark of laughter.

"You're gonna have your hands full with this one brat."

The copy-nin merely shrugged in response as Iruka's brain mulled over Tsunade's words. 

"Wait… what?" He croaked out looking at her quizzically.

A slender brow arched as a somewhat unnerving smile crossed her face.

"I had to  _ seal _ your chakra Iruka-kun, so on top of…" she waved her hand flippantly "Whatever the fuck this is you are also now as weak as fucking newborn. Which is going to leave you  _ disoriented _ for the next few days as your body adjusts to the change."

Well that made sense but how did that factor Kakashi into the equation…?

Oh  _ fuck _ .

No no no no no, she couldn't possibly be suggesting?

Tsunade saw the realisation cross Iruka's face and smiled a little more mischievously than Iruka would have liked. It was a smile he associated with scheming pre-genin and that very rarely boded well for him.

"This idiot.." she jabbed her thumb at Kakashi "Has a lot of experience with that kind of depletion. He's the perfect person to help you through it; also he's the only person stupid enough to not be afraid of you when you go off on one so you can't bully him into getting what you want. You are being ordered to  _ rest _ Sensei and at least with Kakashi there I have at least a little faith that you will."

Oh Kami could this be any  _ more _ embarrassing? He felt like such a  _ fucking _ dunce.

"Kakashi you are allowed to use any means necessary to make sure he rests."

"Of course Hokage-sama." The copy-nin replied a little to gleefully for Iruka's liking.

The Hokage was apparently happy with his answer as she clapped her hands together in approval before moving toward the door.

"You'll be released tomorrow morning Iruka-kun, you better not end up back here or we will be having  _ words _ ."

The way she emphasized words suggested very strongly that there would be no talking involved. She left the room and Iruka was fairly certain he could hear her chanting 'Sake' down the hospital corridor, he shook his head in exasperated amusement.

"So I guess I'll see you in the morning then Iruka-san."

The brunette's attention snapped back to the rooms other occupant, he'd almost forgotten Kakashi was still there.

"Um… I guess so…"

He gave him a quick two fingered salute before flicking through the hand signs for a teleportation jutsu and disappearing in a swirl of dust and leaves.

Iruka watched the debris settle down and tried to calm his mind with it but there was too much to process. One thing was for certain though, Hatake Kakashi had just become his babysitter.

_ Fuck _ .

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the condition I described in this chapter, while exaggerated for narrative affect is a very real thing. It's something I myself have suffered with for several years and it's horrible. I'm not constantly in pain but if I have a 'Flare up' it can knock me on my ass for a good few days (Which is much better than the start because I was off for months with it.)
> 
> Because it's kinda innocuous but horrible I thought it would be fitting to inflict on my favourite Chunin lol.
> 
> Aren't I the best.


	3. The Walk of Shame

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Iruka is an idiot and Kakashi is kind of a justified asshole.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh WOW. Guys you are all amazing.
> 
> Thank you so much for the support.

Aches and Pains 

Chapter 3: The Walk of Shame 

Iruka was awoken the next morning by the sound of birdsong outside his window. Eyes still screwed shut he groaned into the pillow, he was in the _fucking hospital_ couldn't he have a nice lie in just for _once._ Sure the tweet-tweet of the annoying birds was actually pretty nice, soothing even but that didn't mean he wanted to have it blaring in his ears when he woke up in the morning.

He groaned again, wishing he could smother himself with his pillow.

It was morning.

Which by Iruka's calculation meant he had approximately three or four hours before Kakashi actually deigned to show up and begin his 'mission'. He knew he was being somewhat bratty about the whole situation but he just didn't care. He didn't want or _need_ the Jounin's help, he was perfectly capable of looking after himself.

It wasn't anything against Kakashi in general they were perfectly civil and if he was being perfectly honest he would have balked at anyone Tsunade suggested but the idea of the man butting his way into his life for an indefinite amount of time against his will made his skin crawl.

He _hated_ when things were out of his control.

The Chūnin still felt like shit, the pain rippling across his ribcage and he could feel the painkillers starting to wear off. 

He had two options.

One, he could stay here probably get some more very nice, strong painkillers, wait for Kakashi and just deal with this like the grown ass man he supposedly was.

Two, he could try and get the fuck out of here, escape back to his apartment and wall himself in until this just passed maybe catch up with a bunch of paperwork that had been laying around for far longer than it should have. He'd like to see anyone get through all the wards on his apartment unscathed.

Seriously, how bad could it _really_ be? He _wasn't_ an invalid, he didn't need a _babysitter_.

The window was looking more and more tempting.

Mind made up Iruka swung his legs around gently, gritting his teeth as he pulled himself into a sitting position. Standing was a more tricky, he wobbled for a good few minutes and had to use the furniture dotted around to keep his balance but he eventually managed to feel steady. The brunette grinned at his success, mentally dancing.

_'See Iruka you're fine, Hokage-sama was just being overzealous.'_

He thanked whatever deities were currently on his side as he found a set of uniform blacks in one of the drawers in the small room. It took far more effort than Iruka would care to admit to pull on the clothing and he was almost sick again trying to pull on the comfortable shirt but he managed to ward it off through sheer, stubborn will.

Fully clothed the Chūnin decided today was starting to look up immeasurably. 

Now to make good on his escape. 

Iruka slunk toward the window feeling more steady with every step, he could do this. He casually eased it open, keeping a careful ear out for any nurses passing by. Luckily the room he was in was stationed on the west side of the hospital and therefore he didn't have to worry about anyone passing underneath and catching him in the act. The brunette carefully swung his leg over the pristine edge and sat his weight down, ducking his head under the open pane.

Of course that was the moment his plan decided to go to shit. Pain and nausea hit worse than even the first attack and the whole world tilted sideways quite literally. His whole body lurched out of the open window and tumbled down toward the ground.

Iruka grimaced and braced himself the best he could, he was only on the 1st floor but without chakra this was _really_ going to fucking hurt when he landed. He closed his eyes and waited for the inevitable impact.

It didn't come.

A brown eye cracked open and the Chūnin literally wanted to die on the spot, his face literally going as red as he'd ever remembered.

"Well I have to admit this was unexpected, swooning for me already Sensei."

Kakashi's eye crinkled into a teasing smile and Iruka felt his outrage and fury stir. The Jounin had fucking caught him, and was holding him in a bridal carry; which he didn't appear to be releasing. Growling the brunette began to shove weakly against Kakashi's chest, trying to break free out of sheer mortification.

"Let me _go_ you asshat." He snarled.

He wasn't entirely sure how but the eye smile seemed to get even more fucking smug. 

"And why would I do that?" 

Iruka resisted the urge to scream but couldn't quite resist the urge to punch Kakashi in the face. The Jounin didn't even move, didn't even _flinch_ when the blow glanced across his chin. The Chūnin stared at his fist, he'd out everything he had into that blow and it hadn't done a thing.

Oh _fuck_. He really was weak.

Hesitantly he raised his gaze to meet the Jounin's and the brunette felt the breath catch in his throat at look in the steel grey eye.

_'I am so dead.'_

"Um…"

Before Iruka had even realised what had happened he found his whole world flipped on its head and his face was buried in a flak jacket. He flailed weakly attempting to wriggle out of Kakashi's hold but the Jounin's grip was like iron and held him firm over his shoulder.

"Hatake let me go you asshole, I swear to Kami I will make your life a living hell…. I will..." He hissed as the earlier pain re-emerged and clamped his mouth shut.

Kakashi sighed beneath him.

"If you're going to act like a brat Sensei then I'm going to treat you like a brat. Now how about we go see the nice nurses and get you something before you throw up on me… again."

Oh Kami, Iruka had never felt so humiliated in all his life and all he could do was nod pathetically.

Actually scratch that, several minutes later was exactly when the brunette had reached peak humiliation. He was still slung across the Jounin's shoulder as Tsunade and Sakura glared at his stupidity.

"Iruka.." Tsunade's voice was low and dangerous "What in the name of the _Kami_ did you think you were doing?"

And yup he was in deep, _deep_ shit. The Hokage didn't take to kindly to people trying to escape the hospital before their allotted time.

"I… uh…."

She waved away his garbled response.

"I do not want to hear it. I thought you were meant to have a brain in there Iruka!?"

The amber eyes flashed with a promise of something very unpleasant if he tried such a stupid stunt again. Iruka was going to blame his terrible lack of judgement on the lovely, lovely drugs they had just given him more of and not on the fact he'd decided to spit his dummy out like a toddler over the whole babysitter mission.

It was all the drugs.

"Get him home Hatake. I'll send someone over later today to do a check-up on him." The Hokage growled.

"Of course Hokage-sama." Kakashi replied.

The Jounin spun on his heel and walked out the front door of the hospital Iruka still slung over his shoulder. The brunette could hear the giggles of the nurses and clerical staff as they left and tried to kill Kakashi with the force of his thoughts alone.

They strode out of the hospital grounds and into the main street of Konoha and Iruka quickly realised that the Jounin had no intention of releasing his hold. Frustrated and embarrassed beyond all measure he began to pound on the man's back.

"Hatake let me the fuck down! You don't need to carry me, I can make my own way." He hissed venomously.

Kakashi stopped and for the briefest of seconds Iruka thought that he'd actually won.

"I don't think so Sensei." The copy-nin's words were slow and measured, borderline condescending. "If you were dumb enough to fall out of window trying to escape the hospital then I clearly can't trust you to not do something stupid and hurt yourself more. I feel teaching by action is an effective way to drive home a point, hopefully this little embarrassment will make you think before you act worse than Naruto."

_Ouch_. 

The man really didn't pull his punches and Iruka felt himself physically wince. He dropped his head in shame just wishing for the whole ordeal to be over. 

The Jounin sighed softly "Besides, I really don't want to deal with Naruto and the hordes of mini-nin and fangirls if I let something happen to their precious Iruka-Sensei. I'm really just preserving my own safety more than yours."

It was a lame attempt at humor but it weirdly made Iruka feel a little better. He knew the other man was only trying to help and thus far all Iruka had done was be kind of an asshole to him. 

Maybe he should try and be a bit nicer.

There was a flash of orange out of the corner of the brunette's eye and all that previous good will went out the window.

He was not going to be seen like this with _that_ on full display, people were going to _talk_.

Iruka raised his elbow and caught Kakashi in the back of the head, it was weak but it had just enough force to send the Jounin's face into the book.

The copy-nin just chuckled and carried on walking, the Chūnin cursing up a storm.

  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Let the games begin mwahahahahaha


	4. Home sweet home??

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Kakashi is impressed then worried by Iruka and Iruka is mortified for varying reasons.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well technically it's after Christmas. This chapter actually caused me a little more trouble than I thought it would... Also turned out a little less cracky 🙄

Chapter 4: Home sweet Home?

Iruka sighed, feeling himself flop in abject defeat as Kakashi smoothly climbed the stairs toward his apartment. He could honestly say the 'walk' from the hospital really ranked right up there on the 'fucking stupid ways Umino Iruka has embarrassed himself in public' list. 

It was a surprisingly long list, well not to him, but if people had actually investigated how often he'd made a public ass out of himself then they would likely be surprised at the frequency. Admittedly most of the incidents were from his misspent youth but that didn't mean he hadn't had a few corkers as an adult.

The less said about the Anko, the eels in the forest of death and neon rainbow glitter the better.

The Jounin came to an abrupt stop outside what Iruka assumed to be the front door to his apartment, he couldn’t exactly tell as he was facing the opposite way. 

“What the fuck?”

The curse from Kakashi brought a smile to the brunette's lips. _ 'I guess he's just seen my ward configuration _ ' he thought with undisguised amusement. He felt the copy-nin shift and heard the distinct rustle of a hitai-ate being shifted and Iruka couldn't help but feel a little smug that the Jounin was having to use his Sharingan to try and figure out how to get into his home.

"Seriously why does a Chūnin-sensei have a more complicated warding seal than the Kami-damn  _ Hokage _ ?"

Iruka couldn't help himself he chuckled, despite the horrible wave of pain it sent through him. He felt his whole body seize again and the brunette blinked away the spots dancing before his eyes, he was so,  _ so _ close to sanctuary he couldn't pass out at the last moment. Iruka sucked in what little breath he could and tried to focus on the complicated seal Kakashi was studying with intense scrutiny.

His mind floated through the intricate designs, each symbol and stroke an anchor against the unpleasantness threatening to overwhelm him. Iruka had always enjoyed working with seals. There was something quite beautiful in seeing a new seal take shape, watching it blossom like a deadly flower. The warding seal on his door had literally taken years to reach this point and it was still ever evolving, more out of necessity than anything else. Once Naruto had started hanging around more the small apartment had needed the extra layer of security because unfortunately people were assholes.

It had, however meant that he'd had a lot of testing opportunities over the years, a very small silver lining to this shit laden cloud. 

Kakashi gently set him down on the ground before turning back to Iruka's door, brows furrowed in confusion as he tried to read the seal further. Iruka couldn't help but feel a little smug, Kakashi was known to be quite proficient with seals himself according to his file.

"Well this could be a problem."

Now it was Iruka's turn to frown, problem? Oh  _ shit _ , of course the wards were keyed into his chakra. He wanted to scream in frustration,  _ how _ had he overlooked something so obvious? With the idea of his warm comfortable sanctuary looking further and further away he slumped against the wall feeling sick.

Sighing he knew he had no choice. He was tired and sore and embarrassed and he just wanted to be home already.

"C'mere." He murmured, grabbing the Jounin by the wrist.

There was a momentary flicker of surprise in the grey eye but he allowed Iruka to lead his wrist to the door before smirking.

"Holding hands already Sensei? At least buy me dinner first."

"Shut  _ up _ Hatake." The brunette growled, stomping unapologetically on Kakashi's instep ferociously.

Stupid. Asshole. Jounin making this more uncomfortable than it already was.

Iruka placed his free hand against the seal then tugged the captured wrist to place Kakashi's pale hand over his own. He cringed at how  _ intimate _ the position seemed but there really wasn't anything for it, they'd be here for  _ hours _ otherwise.

"Chakra." 

"Wha…?"

The Chūnin ground his teeth together on frustration.

"I need you to funnel your chakra into my hand so I can trip the back door in the seal."

He felt Kakashi hesitate for the briefest of seconds.

"I don't think that's a good idea Sensei."

"Right now I don't actually care if it's a good idea or not, I just want to be in my apartment so I can hide myself away until this bullshit passes over."

He wasn't shouting but Iruka didn't need to, the sheer tone in his voice would have made grizzled, battle hardened hardened ninjas piss themselves in sheer terror if they weren't too insane enough to notice. Kakashi noticed, he noticed and sighed in exasperation or anger the brunette couldn't quite tell.

A long moment stretched between them.

"Fine." The Jounin said voice low. "But I'm not taking the blame from Tsunade."

"Fine." Iruka replied.

Kakashi stilled himself and focused on the hand laying over Iruka's and the Chūnin sucked in a breath as the chakra flowed into his hand. After not being able to feel his own for the last fourteen or so hours it was almost overwhelming and (Iruka was ashamed to admit) pleasurable. He felt the slight crackle of lightning run through his skin, Kakashi's chakra nature making itself abundantly known.

Through the heady euphoria the brunette focused on the seal in front of him and gently threaded the borrowed chakra through the numerous layers. It was tedious and frustrating but at the same time satisfying, Iruka had built this seal to be difficult and it was a good feeling that it was even difficult for him to breach in this situation.

The minutes ticked by and the brunette continued to weave his way through the seal, carefully deactivating what was needed before activating the unlocking glyph.

Finally,  _ finally _ Iruka was finished, he pushed the last shred of chakra into the glyph and watched as the seal on the door shimmered before fading back into the wood inactive. The Chūnin heaved out a sigh of relief, wincing only slightly. It had taken more effort than he'd intended but it was open and he could hide the fuck away. 

Kakashi withdrew his hand and pulled his chakra with him and  _ oh that was a weird sensation. _ Iruka's head swam as the electric energy was leeched from his body and his whole balance decided to just go to shit. The high he'd felt having chakra back in his system immediately dissipated and he felt weaker than he'd ever felt. He stumbled backwards as his legs gave out underneath him and hissed as a pair of arms caught him roughly under his arms, jarring his abused torso.

"I told you it was a bad idea." Kakashi murmured into Iruka's ear.

"Smart-ass." The Chūnin shot back weakly, trying and failing to extract himself from the Jounin's arms.

Kakashi adjusted them gently, so that Iruka had his arm draped over his shoulder and he walked them inside the apartment. The brunette tried to protest at being handled in such a manner but his head was feeling so light and woozy he could only mutter out a weak rebuttal.

"Hmm… I have to admit I had you pegged as a bit of a neat freak Sensei, I see where Naruto gets it from now."

Iruka felt his face heat up as he gazed around his small apartment, it was a bit of a disaster area. There were papers strewn literally everywhere, empty coffee cups lined most of the surfaces and in the corner his laundry basket was overflowing.

_ Welp this is embarrassing. _

He'd honestly been intending to sort out his apartment at… some point but he'd just been so busy with his duties that he just hadn't had the opportunity yet. Okay, maybe  _ maybe _ Tsunade might have been a  _ teeny _ bit right, he'd been overdoing it just a little. Not enough to warrant any of the bullshit she was putting him through but maybe he should at least be making sure his apartment was suitable for guests.

The Chūnin laughed mentally at the thought, he was pretty sure Kakashi was the first 'guest' he'd had in years. Naruto, used to frequently stop by before he left but hadn't visited since returning.

A wave of sadness and fatigue rolled over Iruka and he just wanted to sleep for a million years; his whole being sagged under the weight.

Kakashi seemed to notice the dip in him and quickly began herding him toward what the Jounin assumed was the bedroom. The layout of most of the apartments in this part of town were pretty similar so Kakashi had a good idea where everything was but he would not put it past Iruka to be inadvertently awkward.

He hesitated at the closed door.

"Do you think you can make it into the bedroom unaided Iruka-Sensei?"

The brunette muttered something unintelligible slumping further into Kakashi's side.

That was a no then.

Sighing the copy-nin put his free hand on the handle and braced himself for the disaster beyond. He pushed the door open and stared, the room was pristine. If Kakashi hadn't known otherwise that Iruka had been in the village constantly he would have guessed that this bedroom belonged to an active field ninja. It clearly hadn't been used in some time. 

A grey eye flicked to the well loved couch and Kakashi could make out the outline of a body on the cushions. So Iruka had been working until he dropped and then crashing on the couch. Not unheard of for ninja but for the bedroom to be this neglected… it spoke of a lack of physical well being and self-neglect that made the Jounin frown.

He gently pushed the Sensei toward the clean but unused bed and Iruka was too out of it by this point to fight him. The brunette promptly collapsed on the soft mattress and was snoring within minutes, it would have been funny if it hadn't been so worrying.

Sighing Kakashi stepped out of the room and closed the door behind him. This was already proving to be more troublesome than he'd anticipated and the Jounin was pretty certain the second Iruka woke up he'd be trying to herd him away. 

Not that he'd succeed, Kakashi was equally stubborn and a mission was a mission.

He was  _ not _ going to fail it.

His gaze roamed the disaster area of an apartment and the Jounin felt something in him twitch a little bit. How could anyone be this messy? Under most circumstances he would just leave it as it is but remembering the embarrassed look on Iruka's face he imagined the brunette would be equally mortified when his next visitors arrived.

There was nothing for it.

He rolled up his sleeves and set to work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Chuckles* Huh Domestic Goddess Kakashi... Didn't actually see that coming initially. Comments and kudos are love 💓


	5. House Guests

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which there is good food, good people and shennanigans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG I'M SO SORRY!
> 
> I honest to god have been working on this since I uploaded the last one but due to time constraints and my life getting flipped upside down I've either been too damn busy or mentally screwed to write.
> 
> I'm sort of evening out now so I aim to be more productive over the next few weeks. (If life allows me too....)
> 
> Enjoy!

Chapter 5: House Guests.

Iruka awoke surrounded by softness, he cracked open a bleary brown eye and was surprised to find his face smushed into a crisp pillow. Bed? How had he gotten into bed? The memories came flooding back and the brunette felt his face heat up with sheer mortification.

_ Oh Kami _ Kakashi had carried him to his bed.

This day literally could not get  _ any _ worse.

Iruka would immediately rue that hasty statement because apparently it could. At that moment another wave of pain decided to strike, amplified due to his position and the fact that the pain killers had well and truly worn off by that point. Grimacing the chunin flipped himself onto his back to try and relieve some of the pressure on his chest. 

This however proved to be a  _ costly _ mistake.

Once he was flat on his back the vice-like sensation felt more like an industrial crusher and his mind swam as his body forgot how to breathe in oxygen. His senses were overwhelmed with pain and tightness and  _ oh fuck _ there was the nausea working it’s way up his throat again. Through gritted teeth the brunette managed to flip himself onto his side head hanging over the edge of the bed as he wretched.

It appeared the sounds of his suffering were enough to alert the Jounin who was lurking in the other room as he burst through the door looking a bit dusty and wearing… his apron? The shock of seeing the infamous Jounin, _Sharingan_ _Kakashi_ dressed in a disgustingly girly apron that Naruto had gotten him as a dare momentarily halted Iruka's brain and he was able to catch his breath before the onslaught started again.

Kakashi knelt down next to him and placed some kind of receptacle on the floor for Iruka to vomit into, then slowly and carefully, he held a syringe in front of glazed brown eyes.

"Iruka-san, I have some of the good pain meds here please try and keep still. I'm not trying to hurt you but I'm going to have to jab you."

The words were fuzzy through his pain-addled brain but discernible. He gave a quick nod, scrunching his eyes shut in embarrassment and trying his damndest to ignore the gentle hand that was curled around the back of his knee holding his leg steady.

"Alright Sensei, I'm going to have to use some force to get through your clothes unless…"

The brunette hissed through gritted teeth. "Don't…. Even…"

Kakashi took advantage of Iruka's distraction to slam the syringe into the Chūnin's ass and depressed the plunger then darted back as if Iruka was going to hit him.

Iruka gave an undignified yelp as the syringe pierced his skin but then the blessed,  _ blessed _ relief began to spread through his body. He slumped on the bed as the world began to take on that lovely fuzzy, shine that only narcotics could bring. After a few minutes he decided to give raising his head a go, and  _ yaaaaay _ that worked. His brain gave a victorious giggle.

Iruka's eyes fell once again on the apron clad Jounin and this time he couldn't stop the chuckle erupting from his throat at the strange appearance, immensely grateful that it didn't fucking hurt anymore. 

Kakashi's visible eye narrowed in annoyance.

"Well it looks like the meds are working." 

Iruka continued to chuckle much to the copy-nin's chagrin, he just couldn't help himself. The image of the infamous Jounin dusty and decked out in an apron like some homemaker was just too hilarious to his doped up brain to take. His imagination didn't stop at the reality it started to conjure additions to the image and soon in Iruka's mind Kakashi was sporting a pair of marigolds, a hairnet and a pair of pink fuzzy slippers.

The chuckle turned into full fledged laughter.

The mental image was so absurd Iruka just couldn't help himself, he had no regrets as the tightness erupted across his torso and made him feel dizzy. He hadn't laughed like that in a long, long time and as his laughter died down to a wheeze Iruka had to bite his lip to prevent another wave erupting.

"Quite finished Sensei?" Kakashi asked completely bland.

Iruka nodded and despite the dull tone the brunette was quite sure he could see the barest hint of red peeking out from under his mask.

"Come on, let's get you out of here and get something to eat in you."

It was at that moment Iruka realised there was a mouthwatering smell filling the small apartment and Iruka's stomach let out a loud grumble. He flushed but nonetheless swung his legs off the side of the bed and attempted to stand. Iruka's legs shook underneath him but didn't give, the deep sleep seemingly having done him a world of good. Kakashi hovered by his side giving him enough space to not feel like he was imposing but still close enough incase something went awry.

"Lead the way Hatake-san."

The Jounin stepped out of the doorway and allowed Iruka to lead the way. The brunette was acutely aware of the other man hovering beside him as if he was waiting for him to make a further ass of himself but right now Iruka couldn't find it in him to care. The food smelt too appealing and he was too hopped up on painkillers to actually give much of a fuck.

He quickly took a seat at the small table eyes scanning the food laid out before him. It wasn't something Iruka had seen before it looked delicious and he shot a curious look at the copy-nin who shifted a little from foot; whether it was from anxiety or anticipation the Chūnin couldn't tell.

"It's not poisonous is it?"

Kakashi gave a soft snort and shook his head.

"I wouldn't exactly be a good babysitter if I poisoned my ward would I?" He retorted.

Iruka couldn't exactly fault his logic but he'd irritated too many Jounin to not have at least the smallest sense of self preservation.

"What is it?"

"Roasted miso eggs with eggplant and pumpkin. Full of vitamins and protein for the growing boy." 

Iruka scowled at the teasing tone and reluctantly picked up his utensils, despite the delicious smell he was fully expecting this to taste  _ ghastly _ . He braced himself and took a bite. Iruka's scowl deepened  _ 'Kami dammit it's actually good.' _

Kakashi noticed the scowl and asked with sincerity.

"What's wrong Sensei?"

"It's good." His voice was almost pouting.

The copy-nin stared for the briefest of seconds before starting to laugh. Iruka just glared and sullenly ate another mouthful of the delicious food, he wasn't going to waste the first home-cooked meal he'd had in quite a while.

After a few minutes Kakashi stopped laughing and scratched the back of his head nervously.

"You're the first person I think I've cooked for in a long time Sensei. I'm glad I haven't lost my touch."

Iruka felt his own face heat up a little at the admission and he started down into the steaming bowl feeling awkward once again and wishing that he was anywhere but here and with anyone but Kakashi. Humiliation burned through his stomach and Iruka found his appetite waning despite the food being delicious.

Apparently the gods had decided to show the Chūnin some mercy as there was a loud knocking at the door. Kakashi raised an eyebrow and Iruka nodded, with easy grace the Jounin removed the embarrassing apron and slunk toward the door, opening it slowly.

"What are you doing here Baka-Sensei!?!"

Naruto, there was no way Iruka was mistaking that voice and he winced a little at the sheer volume. There was a distinct thud sound and a yelp of pain and the Chūnin couldn't help but chuckle lightly, immediately knowing who Naruto's companion was.

"Kakashi-Sensei is helping Iruka-Sensei with his recovery, I literally just explained this to you!"

"Okay, okay I forgot Sakura-chan. No need to be so rough." Naruto sulked.

Kakashi still stood unmoved by the door seemingly waiting for the teens to give a reason as to why they were there or waiting for Iruka's permission to allow the entrance. The brunette was weirdly touched by the respect to his privacy and again another perception had been altered. Despite his assholish demeanor the copy-nin could be surprisingly considerate when he wanted to. 

'Wanted to' being the operative phrase there.

"It's fine Kakashi-san, you can let them in."

Iruka immediately hoped he wouldn't regret this decision.

The Jounin stood to one side and the two teens entered the small apartment. Despite his more mature looks Naruto bolted toward Iruka looking as if he was about to hug tackle the older man. The Chūnin was pretty certain he would have done so had a gloved hand not grabbed the collar of his jacket and forced him to an abrupt stop.

"Recovering, remember Naruto. You can't just throw yourself at Iruka-Sensei." 

Kakashi's voice was cool but there was a definite threat layered there as he let go of the blonde's collar. Naruto folded his arms across his chest and huffed and Iruka couldn't help but smile at the antics, as much as Naruto professed his newfound maturity he still occasionally slipped back into his more immature habits.

The Chūnin chuckled softly. 

"Don't pout Naruto, it doesn't become a future Hokage." 

There was a look of betrayal on Naruto's face but Iruka could see that it was a falsehood, after a few seconds it broke out into a small smile and he placed a gentle hand on Iruka's shoulder.

"I'm just glad you're ok Sensei. I wouldn't know what to do if you weren't here to buy me ramen."

There was so much more layered under that statement and the brunette felt a lump stick in his throat, despite everything Naruto still cared and hadn't forgotten him. He stared down at the bowl of food still steaming slightly in an attempt to not give away his emotions, albeit rather unsuccessfully.

Deciding to lighten the mood Naruto peered at the bowl and wrinkled his nose in amused disgust.

"What? Is that?"

"Roasted miso eggs with eggplant and pumpkin, Kakashi-Sensei cooked it for me."

Two pairs of eyes went wide with outrage and zeroed in on the Jounin who was hovering on the edge of the room.

"You can cook!!!" Both Naruto and Sakura shrieked in unison.

Kakashi merely shrugged and Iruka looked confused at the can of worms he had inadvertently opened. Sakura walked over to where Kakashi was standing and jabbed him in the chest.

"All those missions where we had to survive on ration bars and endure Naruto's disgusting attempts at cooking…"

"HEY!"

"..Were for no reason, you told us you couldn't cook!"

The Chūnin could  _ feel _ the shit eating smirk behind Kakashi's mask, to be honest he was finding it hard to hold in his laughter as well. It was hard not too, the looks of indignant betrayal on both of the teens faces was absolutely  _ fucking _ hilarious. 

"Actually Sakura-chan, I never specifically said I  _ couldn't _ cook. I also never specifically said that I  _ could. _ " 

Sakura glared, clearly trying to think of a retort but failing miserably. As usual Kakashi had formulated the perfect response and had left his students floundering. Maybe he should throw them a bone? After all, he still did  _ owe _ the copy-nin for that fiasco in the hospital.

"Oh yes…" Iruka started evil glee quite apparent in his voice "Kakashi-Sensei is quite the domestic goddess, you should have seen him pottering around the kitchen in that apron you got me Naruto."

The silence that hung in the air was like a physical object just waiting to be shattered.

"Wait…. What!?!" Naruto spluttered before bursting into hysterical laughter.

It was almost worth the death glare from the Jounin and the barely audible 'traitor' just to see Sakura break her usual stoic façade and join her blonde haired comrade in laughing at their Sensei's expense.

He smirked at Kakashi who toned down the death glare to a look of exasperated amusement and shrugged. For the first time in quite a while Iruka felt relaxed and content, quite happy to just enjoy the moment and the warm feeling of camaraderie. He hadn't realised how much he'd missed this and a small selfish part of him wished that it was like this every day.

The Chūnin let out a content sigh and continued to eat the delicious meal feeling surprisingly at peace with the world, at least for that moment in time.

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kakashi 1 Iruka 1.
> 
> Heh heh heh. Let the games begin.


End file.
